Long Stretch

It is has been kind of a tough week for this mama.  I have felt discouragement building in me that started to give way this morning during Ashlyn's occupational therapy session.  We seem to be going through a stretch right now where we aren't seeing much progress in things we have been working on with Ashlyn for awhile.  As her mom, I often am wondering if I am doing everything okay.  Should I be trying something different?  The problem is, I really don't know what else to try.

I think Ashlyn would be much happier if she was moving around, but she isn't crawling yet.  I feel bad for her when I see her frustrated.  I try everything to help her, but lately it seems to make her more frustrated.  She is still having trouble getting food in her mouth by herself....it keeps getting caught in her fingers.  I have been noticing that she seems to be doing something weird with her thumb (pulling it in instead of holding onto the food) and this morning I mentioned it to our therapist.  She noticed the same thing.  She called it "hypermobile"....basically Ashlyn has looser joints, which can make things like this hard.  So, she said we might need to try a splint on her hand to help her with this. 

This past week between working on picking up food and trying to help Ashlyn drink through a straw, meal times have been kind of stressful.  On several occasions Ashlyn was arching her back in her high chair and crying and I was trying to remain calm and encourage her.  During one of those times Kyla said to Ashlyn, "Don't worry, Ash, Jesus is with you."  And then she asked me if we could pray for Ashlyn, so we stopped and did just that....."Dear Jesus, please help Ashlyn while she is trying to pick up her crackers."  It is so simple but so profound at the same time.  I am very thankful for the heart I see developing in Kyla....her heart towards Ashlyn and Jesus.  I am thankful that each moment can be turned into a God moment....where we invite Him in.  I am thankful that during times when I was inwardly starting to lose it, my three year old pointed me to Jesus. 

A few months ago I was with a mom who is a parent of teenagers and we were talking about different mothering types of things and she said something that will always stay with me.  She said, "The goal for our children is not for them to live a life of ease, but for them to be like Christ."  That really spoke to me because I think we all want our kids to have things as easy as possible....we don't want them to have to struggle.  But, I was reminded through this long week of watching Ashlyn continue to try and try and seeing Kyla with her, that my prayer is that our whole family will be more like Christ because of it.  No, it isn't always easy, but moments that inspire prayers like, "Dear Jesus, please help Ashlyn while she is trying to pick up her crackers" are worth so much more than the struggle.

So, yes, it has been a challenging week.  It has been a little exhausting for me as a mom.  My heart hurts at times.  But, oh, I love these girls!  And, Daddy is home today....Daddy has a way of making everything more calm......we girls adore him!  The word "perseverance" is on my mind today...perseverance in working with Ashlyn, in prayer and in trusting God.....and in knowing that this long stretch will soon give way to lots of new things.  Thankful today for peace in the middle of challenge.